Part 1: What type of wedding is right for us?
The Backstory: I recently (September 2024) got engaged (see the video HERE and now it’s my turn! It’s my partner’s job to get couples engaged (see PROposal Hawaii), it is my job to marry people, and it’s our job to plan out couple’s weddings when you book an all inclusive package (browse HERE after reading)! Now that I am on the other side of the altar, my perspective has shifted and I am far more empathetic and far more challenged with the weight of planning! Throughout this process I’ve been challenged to look at how we run our wedding businesses through a whole new light. Here’s a modge-podge of things I’ve learned so far about how to run my officiant business while planning my own wedding.
What type of destination wedding is right for us?
Elope just the two of us? Micro-wedding in Oahu? Destination wedding somewhere we have been? Destination wedding somewhere out in this big wide world?
Defining the type of wedding has had some pros and cons for each type. Obviously, Drake and I are in the elopement and micro-wedding space in Hawaii, we know just how easy, stress free and wonderful an intimate elopement on a beach or lush jungle can be for our couples.
But what is right for us?
All my couples say something along the lines of, “We agreed that this was right for us.”
And this didn’t just apply to deciding upon eloping in Hawaii. What is “right” has a whole host of meanings!
What is “right” is relative to each couple.
Some are more than content to have an old fashioned elopement just the two of them on a beach in Hawaii just the officiant and photographer present. Some choose to mix and match - opting for the destination elopement in Hawaii just them and a reception on their anniversary date in the following years.
The one thing I have learned for sure is that there is no “right” way to get married, only what is right for the couple!
How this has changed me as a wedding officiant in Hawaii for couples lookng for a destination elopement or micro-wedding?
I am far more empathetic to the dilemma of disappointing others for the integrity of your relationship.
I can hear the heaviness during consultations when couples tell me that they had big plans, but ultimately chose to stay true to themselves and their relationship by eloping in Hawaii or having a small and intimate micro-wedding in Hawaii.
I now understand the happy AND sad element that comes along with it. But I also look at it from a standpoint of:
HELL YEAH! Good for you for choosing each other and not what your family thinks because this is how I feel when discussing what is right for Drake and I.
At the end of the day, it is about you two as a unit and choosing to put that first in your marriage is paramount! If having a destination elopement in Hawaii just the two of you - that’s great! If it is sneaking in a few close family members for your destination micro-wedding - that’s great too! Is this just part 1 of your wedding journey - I can’t wait to follow along on social media and see what your next move is!
I am steadfast in continuing to create a brand that reads like your Hawaiian BFF (or MoH).
I am not your average wedding officiant in the slightest. I don’t qualify for AARP, I’m not part of a religious institution, and I don’t hold myself in a stuffy or uptight manner on the internet or in real life.
The biggest compliment that I receive is that I’m mistaken for a family friend at big weddings and that couples are so relieved to be able to be themselves around me (because I am more their peer than an authority figure).
That’s why I work so much with my fiance who is an elopement photographer, it all feels like a double date.
As a business owner, it is easy to look around at the norm and conform.
I’m largely one of the only wedding officiants in Hawaii offering this personalized, Maid of Honor-like, officiating service. Sometimes I think I need to go more corporate, but then I’m reminded on my own journey how much personalization makes the difference.
When you finally get on the phone with a real person - not someone who is speaking in corporate lingo, but talking to you straight, and just being chill - it makes a huge difference in relieving the stress.
Final Thoughts on Planning a Destination Wedding
Now that I am on the other side of planning a wedding, I am so much more empathetic to the nuanced stressors that come along with it.
I hope to continue sharing my journey and that in this journey I can show up more authentically as Your Oahu Officiant.
Ready to plan your destination elopement or micro-wedding with me? Don’t hesitate to fill out the form below to start planning with me.
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